Open Mind

First Word

2008-04-29T18:19:00.002-04:00

Sophie just said "Bird" after the tv said it on Signing Times.
She's said other words before but nothing as clearly as today.

There has been lots of development on her part but since we've been so busy with interviewing for Zhen and other things I haven't been able to post much lately. So much for posting everyday huh?
Currently, she can crawl like a champ, stand up & walk while holding onto furniture.
She can feed herself cheerios and sometimes water from a sippy cup.
We've just started weaning her from breast milk into formula yesterday.
Our Sophie is not too happy with that since she's gotten used to the fact that she can nurse to sleep.
Also, she knows the sign for milk so it's really hard for her to stop telling me that's what she wants.
Along with the word for it as well sometimes "na na". It's the cutest thing when she says it.
Here are the videos of her recent events.

Crawling

2008-01-22T22:18:00.001-05:00

My baby started crawling today!
Well...it's more like a progressive scoot. :-D
I'll upload video when I get a chance.

Macbook Air

2008-01-15T14:40:00.000-05:00

O.K. I know I've said that Apples are awful and not my choice in anything. Well...this new Macbook Air unveiled by Steve sure tickles my fancy. Who wouldn't want a laptop that weighs 3 pounds AND has 5 hours battery life? That's like saying "would you like a yacht and a million bucks?"

2nd Words?

2008-01-13T22:56:00.000-05:00

Well to be fair, Sophie said "da-da" over and over again today. She's an equal-opportunity baby!

First Words?

2008-01-12T17:43:00.000-05:00

Today Sophie said "ma-ma" many times during lunch (without any meaning behind it). Later on when Zhen was holding her, she tried to reach for me so I asked her to call me ma ma and she did! I wouldn't count those words earlier as her first words but it sure seemed like it when I asked her to she said it clearly and with purpose.

7 Months

2008-01-11T21:20:00.000-05:00

Today Sophie turned 7 months old! She is growing so big. I'm going to miss having a baby in the house :-(.

Gymboree Music

2008-01-10T21:58:00.000-05:00

Today was the music class at Gymbo. me and Sophie's first time there. I don't know how much she actually enjoyed it because she just sat there and sucked on a wooden stick the whole time. Sometimes I worry about her. It seems like she is kind of exhibiting signs of autism to me. Maybe I'm just being an extra-paranoid mother but she does not seem to act like the other kids. It could also be because she is one of the younger ones but I just don't feel like she is as outwardly as the other babies...
Anyways, the music class would be fun if all the other mothers didn't use that time effectively as a socializing moment. I'm the same as them. We basically all paid money to have friends with kids our age. Might as well posted an ad on Craigslist "SAHM in need of a friend". The poor music teacher turned to me after a song she sang basically by herself to herself and told me that the moms usually just converse during the time. Since I'm quite introverted...I just sat there and tried to get Sophie to enjoy the music.

Vacation to Mexico

2008-01-09T18:36:00.000-05:00

I made a video from the pictures of our vacation in Puerto Adventuras Mexico at the Sunscape resort and spa. Enjoy!

Being a Mom...

2008-01-08T23:33:00.000-05:00

I saw this posted on one of the discussion boards I look at...
so very true.

Being A Mom

We are sitting at lunch one day when my daughter
casually mentions that she and her husband
are thinking of "starting a family."

"We're taking a survey," she says half-joking. "Do you
think I should have a baby?"

"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping
my tone neutral.

"I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends,
no more spontaneous vacations."

But that is not what I meant at all. I look at my
daughter, trying to decide what to tell her. I want
her to know what she will never learn in
childbirth classes.

I want to tell her that the physical wounds of child
bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will
leave her with an emotional wound so raw that
she will forever be vulnerable.

I consider warning her that she will never again read
a newspaper without asking, "What if that had been MY child?"

That every plane crash, every house fire will haunt
her. That when she sees pictures of starving children,
she will wonder if anything could be
worse than watching your child die.

I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish
suit and think that no matter how sophisticated she is,
becoming a mother will reduce her to
the primitive level of a bear protecting her cub. That an
urgent call of "Mom!" will cause her to drop a soufflé or
her best crystal without a moment's
hesitation.

I feel that I should warn her that no matter how many
years she has invested in her career, she will be
professionally derailed by motherhood. She might
arrange for childcare, but one day she will be
going into an important business meeting and she will think
of her baby's sweet smell. She will have to use every
ounce of discipline to keep from running
home, just to make sure her baby is all right.

I want my daughter to know that every day decisions
will no longer be routine. That a five year old boy's
desire to go to the men's room
rather than the women's at McDonald's will become a major
dilemma. That right there, in the midst of clattering trays
and screaming children, issues
of independence and gender identity will be
weighed against the prospect that a child molester may
be lurking in that restroom.

However decisive she may be at the office, she will
second-guess herself constantly as a mother.

Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to assure
her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy,
but she will never feel the same about herself.

That her life, now so important, will be of less value
to her once she has a child. That she would give
herself up in a moment to save her offspring, but
will also begin to hope for more years, not to
accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child
accomplish theirs.

I want her to know that a cesarean scar or shiny
stretch marks will become badges of honour.
My daughter's relationship with her
husband will change, but not in the way she thinks.

I wish she could understand how much more you can love
a man who is careful to powder the baby or who never
hesitates to play with his child. I think
she should know that she will fall in love with him again
for reasons she would now find very unromantic.

I wish my daughter could sense the bond she will feel
with women throughout history who have tried to
stop war, prejudice and drunk driving.

I want to describe to my daughter the exhilaration of
seeing your child learn to ride a bike. I want to capture for her the
belly laugh of a baby who is touching the soft fur
of a dog or cat for the first time. I want her to taste the joy that is so
real it actually hurts.

My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize that
tears have formed in my eyes. "You'll never regret it,"
I finally say. Then I reached across the table,
squeezed my daughter's hand and offered a
silent prayer for her, and for me, and for all the mere
mortal women who stumble
their way into this most wonderful of callings.

Please share this with a Mom that you know or all of
your girlfriends who may someday be Moms.
May you always have in your arms
the one who is in your heart.

Gymboree

2008-01-08T23:04:00.000-05:00

Today was my first day at the Gymboree play and music class... It was really fun.
Sophie giggled out loud because she was put into fun situations she had never been in before. My daughter actually accepts change with open arms! Even though she is somewhat a scardy-cat, she feels safe with me and is willing to explore the world with me by her side. I can't tell you how wonderful that feels ^_^.
So we're signed up now for 1/2 year of classes. I anticipate my little girl to blossom during this time of learning and interacting with others.

"Joshua"

2008-01-07T23:46:00.000-05:00

Just got finished watching this movie called Joshua.
I didn't know what I was getting myself into but I kind of liked it in the end.
Although I'm biased because I like movies that aren't happily ever after and such.
Hey! Don't sue me for liking unpredictability is movies! That's probably why I hate "chick flicks".
(Shudders at the thought).

Dream

2008-01-07T12:21:00.000-05:00

I had this dream today that made me really sad when I woke up.
A few weeks ago, I read about a baby that died because she had a syndrome that was fatal and extremely rare. I saw her picture and read about her short life.
So in my mind I tried to place myself in the shoes of the mother that lost her baby.
Well unbeknownst to me, my mind decided it would be fun for me to really live it.
I dreamt that I was in China without Sophie for some reason and that my dad and Zhen were to bring her to me. Once they did, her health somehow started to deteriorate. Then I dreamt that Sophie passed away in my arms... except she didn't look like our baby. She looked more like Annabelle (name of the baby I read about). I think I woke myself up from all the sobbing I was doing. My heart goes out to that mother. She sounds so strong in the face of this heartbreaking loss.

Odd Weather

2008-01-06T12:57:00.000-05:00

So I just looked at the weather report for next few days...
It's going to be mid-60's in the middle of January in Cleveland!
Wow! And they thought it was going to be cold...

Poco is Back!

2008-01-05T21:58:00.000-05:00

My parents told me around noon today that some lady returned him to them. Some people are so nice! Poco is worth about $700 but they just wanted to return the dog to his rightful owner. If it was me, I would not return him because he's just so darn cute and smart. However, I've changed my mind about how I would do things in the future. I'm going to be way more considerate of others and how they would feel. The lady who returned Poco brought her teenage daughter who wanted very much to keep him. She even cried! My mom promised her that we will give her a puppy when we get them in the future. Kind of like Rumpelstiskin. I don't mind though because without Poco, we won't get puppies even. I'm glad my baby is back.

Poco Where are you?

2008-01-04T23:53:00.000-05:00

I just found out from my dad that my dear dog Poco just ran away from home. The door was open from the back yard and her ran off into the street. My dad thinks that some person picked him up off of the street and drove off with him. I know I won't be able to sleep well tonight. It's when you lose the ones you love then do you feel how important they are to you.

Yeah Obama!

2008-01-03T23:42:00.000-05:00

I'm so glad Obama won. Just telling Zhen today that if I were to vote republican...it would be Huckabee and democratic...it would be Obama. Can't wait to see what the rest of these caucuses will hold.

Let it Snow Let it Snow

2008-01-02T15:18:00.001-05:00

So yesterday Cleveland got hit with a (mini-) blizzard starting about afternoon and is still kind of going. We've got about 6 inches and unlike Cincinnati, the snow plowers are actually capable of removing the snow from the streets. By rush hour today, the street actually looked pretty decent...down to the secondary roads. I'm glad Cleveland is so efficient. My biggest fear is for something to happen to Zhen on his way to work.
Sophie finally "showed" her response to her first taste of food (cereal) since the 30th. I was getting a little worried because she is usually extremely regular since birth and to have everything come to a halt because of solids was frightening for me. We had a whole serving of cereal today (unlike her first time where I only had a teeny bit ready) and she enjoyed all of it... well along with her bib and the whole bottom part of her face :-D

New Year's Resolutions

2008-01-01T22:21:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year!
I've decided one of my resolutions will be to try my best to write everyday on this blog.
This may not seem like a big deal but it's really for Sophie. Ever since she was born, I've been trying to keep a journal of her everyday happenings but to no avail.
So one way is just to write in this blog to keep a record of everything important that happens with her.
We (yes, even Zhen) went to Sears today to get our portraits and Sophie would not smile much for the lady no matter how we tried. I think it had to do with the fact that she's starting to recognize people that she knows and strangers. Also because she was a little crabby. Oh well! Here they are. The link is actually all the pictures we got from Sears. It's the 3rd set.

Disturbing...

2007-12-31T11:31:00.000-05:00

So I've been getting a lot of my news from BBC lately because I feel the US news is excessively biased. They were talking about Iraqi bloggers and I clicked through to one site in which a woman is blogging from Syria where she took up refuge. I just find it really surprising how much the news leaves out when they report to the American public. They would rather talk about Paris Hilton and "celebrity news" then report about humanity's shameful happenings in Iraq and other countries that the US is occupying. It's only w/ these blogs are we able to really see what's happening. Hopefully the arms of big brother is not as long as to reach through the internet and shush those people as well.

Starting Solids

2007-12-30T23:48:00.000-05:00

Today Zhen and I decided Sophie would start on her solids. She is about 6 1/2 months old to this day and ever since she reached 3 months I've been given crap about her needing to start them soon. Even our pediatrician has been asking about starting them (although I have to say...she was not being pushy). It's odd how people think they know what they are talking about just because they raised kids of their own. The way things are done are constantly changing...in order for me to be a good mother (or anyone for that matter) I need to keep myself updated on the current research in the study of babies. What I've read so far have all told me to wait until 6/7 months. Truthfully speaking...I wanted to start feeding her as soon as she hold her head up. It's a fun thing to do I think. But I kept that urge suppressed so that my baby could have the best possible start that I know of.
Well now we finally fed her and boy was it cute! Sophie actually mourned the end of her meal. She usually only cries when she has to go to sleep but today she cried when I stopped feeding her. I think she takes after her dad in the constant need to sleep and me for the need to eat.
During the feeding she kept on lunging forward to get more of the spoon in her mouth and a few times even tried to "help" with her chubby little hands. Her first meal was rice cereal mixed w/ breast milk. I think she's been ready to start for a while. Hee hee. Poor girl. Well the following is a video we made of her earlier today while we were feeding her. I forgot to charge the camera before we started so we ended up only with two short videos and one picture. There is always tomorrow I guess.

Second Tooth :-)

2007-12-26T15:07:00.000-05:00

So last week I went and posted about Sophie's first tooth. Well she's been fussy at night lately. Don't know if it's because of her teething or a growth spurt (they're supposed to have one around 6-7 months). So today I looked and lo and behold! Another one of the buggers. Of course it comes to me as no surprise since they usually come in twos...but I'm such a proud mommy if she farts I want to tell the world ^_^.

First Tooth!

2007-12-19T10:22:00.000-05:00

Our family just came back this Sunday from a resort in Mexico (Puerto Adventuras) called Sunscape. We are all nice and relaxed now. So on Monday I noticed that there was a white little bump on Sophie's gum line and today her first tooth finally broke through. It's the bottom left one. I tried to take a picture of it don't know if you can actually see it or not. Anyways, yeah!

2007-11-05T00:04:00.000-05:00

Just a thought I read today...Want to share

2007-10-28T17:55:00.000-04:00

Anne Graham gave an
extremely profound and insightful response.
She said, "I believe God
is deeply saddened by this, just as we are,
but for years we've been telling God to get out
of our schools, to get out
of our government and
to get out of our lives.

And being the gentleman
He is, I believe He has
calmly backed out.
How can we expect God
to give us His blessing
and His protection
if we demand He leave
us alone?"

In light of recent events...
terrorists attack,
school shootings, etc.
I think it started when Madeleine Murray O'Hare
(she was murdered,
her body found recently) complained she didn't want prayer in our schools,
and we said OK.

Then someone said you
better not read the Bible
in school .The Bible says
Thou Shalt Not Kill,
Thou Shalt Not Steal ,
and Love Your Neighbor
As Yourself.
And we said OK.

Then Dr. Benjamin Spock
said we shouldn't spank
our children when they misbehave because
their little personalities
would be warped and
we might damage their
self-esteem
(Dr. Spock's son committed suicide).
We said an expert should know what he's talking about.
And we said OK.

Now we're asking ourselves why our children have
no conscience,
why they don't know right from wrong, and why it doesn't bother them to
kill strangers, their classmates, and themselves.

Probably, if we think about
it long and hard enough,
we can figure it out.
I think it has a great deal
to do with
"WE REAP WHAT WE SOW."

Funny how simple it is
for people to trash God
and then wonder why
the world's going to hell.

Funny how we believe
what the newspapers say,
but question what
the Bible says.

Funny how you can send jokes' through
e-mail and they spread
like wildfire, but when
you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing.

Funny how lewd, crude,
vulgar and obscene articles pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion of God is suppressed in the school
and workplace.

Funny how someone can be
so fired up for Christ
on Sunday, but be an
invisible Christian
the rest of the week!

Sophie Turned Over!

2007-10-15T15:30:00.000-04:00

She just flipped over today and have been doing it almost non-stop because it's so new and fun. Well she flips from her back to her belly which isn't supposed to be a baby's first flipping method (usually from belly to back)...but apparently is also normal. What I realized is an issue from her non-conformational way of flipping is that she gets stuck on her belly (which she hates) and cries until Mommy goes to save her. After saving her as many times as she has flipped, I've gotten tired of it. Now I decided she's going to spend more time on her belly until she has learned to save herself. Got to admit that it's so darn cute though!

Mother-in-laws Suck

2007-10-14T13:45:00.000-04:00

Wheew

2007-09-28T01:28:00.000-04:00

False alarm! Isohunt is fine...the torrents are working fine. Apparently, I misunderstood what that article meant (and for some reason I couldn't connect to Isohunt at the same time). They were just stopping their own torrents...which is fine by me since I didn't like them that much anyways. Well after that whole fiasco I found tons of websites that could be a replacement in case Isohunt went down. Which doesn't make any sense as I don't download illegally ^-^.

NOOO!!!

2007-09-27T22:18:00.000-04:00

My favorite site Isohunt.com is preventing access to US clients!
http://www.news.com/8301-10784_3-9785488-7.html
They are doing it as a move to prevent the government from taking information from them of the people that download media illegally! Not saying I do that or anything...
An end of and era if you ask me. RIP Isohunt

Three Months

2007-09-12T23:57:00.000-04:00

Wow! I can't believe it. It's already been three months since Sophie was born.
Sorry I've been MIA. Not because of me being busy w/ Sophie...just been a bum that's all:-).
She has been the best baby. So easy. If all my babies are going to be like that, I wouldn't mind having five. O_O Ha ha ha just kidding. Pregnancy was hell for me cuz of the gestational diabetes. I think because of that, I'm going to wait a while before we start trying for the second one. I want to be able to forget some of that pain I went through.
In these three months, it's amazing to see how Sophie has grown (both physically, socially, and mentally). I'm falling in love with her more and more everyday. One thing that I treasure with babies is when they start to look towards you for comfort and support. Even though she is still so small, I know once she sees me, her eyes clearly brightens and smiles gets wider. Just watching her grow is what encourages me to take another step everyday.
It's been a month since I moved to Cleveland and boy is it lonely here! Zhen is so busy with work he gets to spend about a hour each day (if that) with me. I know he does not mean it but it makes me depressed having to wait for him like a puppy dog everyday. Then on the weekends, he does not try to spend time with me and just does his own stuff. Urgh. Hope this fog lifts soon.....

Piggie

2007-08-16T23:16:00.000-04:00

Sophia Addison Fan

2007-06-15T06:22:00.000-04:00

Introducing our little girl born 6/11/07 @11:07pm.
6lbs 15.2 ozs
19 3/4 inchesOverall everything went really smoothly. The induction/labor was not really as bad as I thought it was going to be. I actually felt it was quite easy... We are however having some breast feeding issues that should be resolved by the end of this week. She is such a good girl. Really does not cry until she is hungry (which is very well timed at once every 3 hours). I love her more than anything really...I would do anything for her. It's odd how that starts from the moment they are born.

Induction

2007-06-08T06:11:00.000-04:00

Just a little update... I'm going to be induced on Monday at 12:45am! Yup! In the middle of the freaking morning. Can't wait though! Zhen and I are so excited! I'm glad I don't have to wait any longer cuz I found out yesterday that I gained 3 pounds in a week! Hee hee hee... have not been keeping my sugars in check because of the move and everything. We'll keep you guys updated. Take care until then!

Rings

2007-05-18T08:22:00.000-04:00

I just realized last night that I can fit into my wedding rings again! Which is very odd since I seem to have de-swelled since about 3/4 months ago and I haven't delivered yet! I mean isn't the assumption that one will be swollen or more and more so until the baby is out and not before? 3/4 months ago I was so sad too that I couldn't fit into them anymore. So since then, I've been wearing my wedding band around my neck on a necklace...but now it's finally back where it should be. Yeah!!!!

Moving

2007-05-18T00:19:00.000-04:00

This whole week Zhen and I have been working hard at packing and organizing. You don't really realize how bad the shopping habit is until you have to put that stuff away in boxes and move them. I've really swore off shopping for useless things for a while... seriously!

Me at about 32 Weeks

2007-05-10T00:20:00.000-04:00

These two are pictures of me that Zhen took when I was a few days after my 8 month mark with Sophie. Mei just got a hair cut so she's looking all thin and all (but very cute w/ her hair in a bow). Poco is just there being his usually cute self. Sorry for my shabby look but this is how I look normally now :-) Also sorry for the background the I flowered out of my apartment. I've been on strike in doing housework since I got pregnant and I don't feel good showing people how lazy I've really been.

Wheew!

2007-04-23T01:48:00.000-04:00

Zhen and I went to Cleveland this weekend to look at apartments. We were quite disappointed if I must be honest about it. I never noticed how old and run-down Cleveland was until I had to go find an apartment in it. We ended up settling on a townhouse in Lakewood which is about 15 mins from Zhen's work at Case hospital. The good point of this place is that it's huge for the price. This townhouse has three bedrooms and a full attic and basement on top of that! Well, we are just so relieved because we don't have to worry too much about living arrangements now. Attached is a picture of the place...it will have to do. Besides, we will probably only stay here for one or two years so it's all temporary. I'm kinda looking forward to raising our little girl here for her first year of life.

So Far in '07

2007-04-19T02:05:00.000-04:00

1. Have you had a boyfriend/girlfriend?
-->Hope not! I'm married :-)

2. Have you had your birthday yet?
-->Nope

3. Have you been to church?
-->No, but I did go last year...

4. Cried yet?
-->Yes, hormones..can't live w/ them. Can't live w/o them.

5. Had someone close to you passed away?
-->No

6. Pulled an all-nighter?
-->Due to baby...yes

7. Drank starbucks?:
-->Yes, the day I took my one hour glucose stress test which I failed miserably

8. Gone shopping?:
-->Mostly for baby.

9.Gone to the movies?:
-->Yup, 500 was great. Zhen and I both enjoyed it.

10. Been to the beach?
-->Hah! Not in Cincy...

11. Bought something for over $100?
-->Yes...a camcorder and other things for baby.

12. Met someone new?
-->People off of craigslist

13. Been out of your home country?
-->Um...I'm here ain't I?

IN THE PAST MONTH :

1. Kissed someone?:
-->Yeah...Zhen of course

2. Slept in a friend's bed:
-->Nope

3. Snuck out of your house
-->Um...I don't think so

4. Gone skinny dipping?
-->Nah...I'm too fat looking now.

5. Been in a bar?
-->Uh...nope.

6. Lied?:
-->Always

7. Got into a fight?:
-->W/ my dad.

8. Gone over your cell phone bill?
-->Nope.

9. Been called names?:
-->Zhen called me a bitch as a joke...I didn't think it was funny tho

11. Done something you regret?
-->Yes. Don't remember it so I guess I don't regret it that much.

L A S T . . .

Person you hugged?
-->Zhen

Last time u called someone?
-->Zhen earlier this afternoon.

When was the last time you felt stupid?
-->Today...I have pregnancy-induced low IQ syndrome

Who was the last person you kissed?
-->Zhen!

Who was the last person who saw you cry?
-->Zhen

What was the last thing that made you cry?
-->My mom and dad.

Who was the last person you watched a movie with?
-->Zhen...man! These answers all end up being Zhen :-)

Who was the last person you danced with?
-->Zhen at a formal for his work

Who did you last yell at last?
-->Poco I think.

Who makes you smile most?
-->My hubby Zhen

What are you listening to right now?
-->Silence

Baby Baby

2007-04-18T13:06:00.000-04:00

Is it me or does there seem like time is flying by? In exactly two months our little baby's due date will be upon us. Well I'm both excited and scared. Can I be trusted w/ the life of such a little one? I mean, I can barely take care of myself and Zhen, let alone someone who will depend on me for EVERYTHING! Such a frightening thought...

Student Massacre

2007-04-16T22:40:00.000-04:00

OK, I know this event that happened today was very tragic and I am as angry about it as the next person. However, I am also very upset about something that the media keeps bringing up... the shooter allegedly is an Asian man and boy do they not let that little tidbit pass through their "wonderful and keen" reporting. I mean if this person was Caucasian or African American, would they keep on repeating that to let people know? I think everyone knows they would not. As an Asian I think it is their way of weeding us out and discriminating against us! OK, me and my pregnant hormones are done fuming now.

Atkins Sucks!

2007-04-16T09:08:00.000-04:00

I just checked my weight and surprisingly I have not gained a single pound in one month...well I did in actuality, just lost it all when I was diagnosed w/ diabetes and started myself on the Atkins diet. Can't wait for this baby to be born so I can have my cake and eat it too!

Baby Shower

2007-04-13T17:54:00.000-04:00

I was so moved the other day. I went over to Mai, my best friend's home and she was so cute...she showed me the baby shower invitations she was making by hand. They had the cutest pea-in-a-pod ideas on them. I loved them! You know what makes them extra special? It's that she is a very busy girl in her third year of medical school. I mean very busy...she's currently rotating in surgery. Which means she basically has no time for herself! I feel so loved sometimes! :-)

Ultrasound Pictures

2007-04-08T00:06:00.000-04:00

These are the ultrasound pictures taken at 29 weeks and 4 days gestation of our darling daughter Sophia Madison Fan. Well that's her name so far. We will most likely call her Sophie in the future. The first one is to prove that she's a girl. The second is a profile picture. The third is of her face from the front and the last is of the ever popular foot.

New Car :-)

2007-04-07T22:48:00.000-04:00

On Friday I went w/ Mai's brother to go "look" at cars at a car dealer. I was kind of interested in the Camry Hybrid and had done some research on pricing and techs etc. Well I thought since this is the first time that I would go negotiate for a car I was going to make a nice practice. The price I had in mind actually turned out to be the price that the salesman agreed on (darn! still too high). So I decided it would be a great time to buy it ^-^. Here is the picture of the car that we got...

it's the same color w/ moonroof and leather interior. I love the fact it's a hybrid. Makes ya feel good :-)

Ultrasound Today

2007-04-05T15:11:00.000-04:00

Just got back from my third ultrasound. We finally got to find out for sure the sex of the baby. It's a girl! She's fattened out since the last time we saw her and is much cuter. I loved this ultrasound tech because she talked throughout most of the scan explaining everything she was doing and what she saw. We found out our baby's weight (supposedly 2 pounds 12 oz) was in the 40th percentile. Her length (about 15inches) was only 26th or so. Then her head size was very funny to Zhen and I... she was measuring 70th percentile. Since Zhen was a big head, we were not very surprised but I sure took advantage to make fun of him. Of all the ultrasounds I've seen when I was an interpreter... I think my own baby is the cutest. Probably not in truth, but it sure looks like that through my eyes :-)

Structured Life

2007-03-30T01:10:00.000-04:00

Well I've never had to be that scheduled in my life...ever!
Basically I have to stick to a time table of when I eat, test my blood sugar, exercise, how much I eat, etc. Gestational diabetes sucks...really. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
I'm still trying to be consistent in how much I eat and when. Therefore if I can, I don't have to go on any of the pills or insulin shots. Which I don't even think the pills are O.K. My dr. recommended Glyburide and it's a category C drug! That means they did animal tests w/ the pill and there were "issues". How am I supposed to give my baby that? But then insulin shots are too much and will cause low blood sugar and other problems. I just don't know what to do.
O.K. I'll stop complaining.

Gestational Diabetes

2007-03-14T15:30:00.000-04:00

I found out early this week after my 3-hour glucose test that I'm considered Gestational diabetic. This sucks. Just when I started craving sugars I have to start staying away from them. Now it's become a wait game since I don't have my next appt. w/ an OB-Gyn until next Monday (I'm switching groups due to insurance). Then they'll have to tell me what to do with this diagnosis. The nurse at my previous OB basically said that my numbers are so high that I will need insulin shots :'(. To top it off...yesterday I was craving so much sweets that I gave in and had some ice cream and chocolates. I'm such a bad mommy.

Google Traffic!

2007-03-02T06:42:00.000-05:00

A lot of things have happened in the less than two months that I last posted. One thing for sure is that my nesting instincts are starting to kick in. In the matter of just two days I've spent a whole lot of money on baby. It's starting to seem more real now that we are 3 months from seeing our little one. We've got the crib, changing table and bassinet down as the major items to buy.
My car kinda quited on me...yes, the Lexus! I hate that it's just been over two years since we bought it and there is going to be over 4 grand invested in fixing the darned thing. I've learned my lesson on buying old. Never go w/o a full engine check before buying! One thing I'm glad about doing is switching from the Lexus dealership to another smaller auto repair place. It's just about cut our prices in half to fix everything. And I almost literaly mean everything.
On another note, we also recently purchased a new laptop (for Zhen) and a new cell phone, a treo 700wx (for Zhen as well in celebration for his new job). This is where the title comes in... I'm so glad you can actually get traffic reports for Cincinnati of the major highways in google maps! It's amazing. I LOVE Google! I also love Zhen's new phone. Technology is so wonderful...we can now go on the internet anywhere w/o having to have a laptop. I know... a lot of people have been enjoying this for quite a while now. But we have finally hopped onto the band wagon and boy is it fun! This phone is also good because we can hook the new laptop up to the internet when he's in Cleveland w/o having to pay for separate broadband or anything. Although we are kinda hurting financially now... oh well! What comes in must go out. That's how I see it.

Great News!

2007-02-09T00:23:00.000-05:00

The reason I'm still up is I'm way too excited. Zhen and I just came back from Cleveland for an interview. He had been trying to match for the colo-rectal fellowships that were available at the beginning of this year. However since he started so late he didn't get a chance to even interview with any of those places. We were kind of worried about what we were going to do with his future as it seems he had to settle for a general surgery position with some group. The people that were supposed to find us jobs did not seem to very helpful at all. Maybe due to the fact that Zhen was coming from a community hospital and with no fellowship training I guess.
Well all of a sudden last week, one of Zhen's co-workers found out about an opening for a minimally invasive colo-rectal fellowship (not accredited tho) which they tried to offer him. However since it's so late in the year already, Zhen's co-worker had already signed up with another hospital. So instead, he referred them to Zhen. Of course we jumped at the chance and had scheduled an interview within a day of finding out about the position basically. Yesterday we went over and had dinner with an attending that was part of the program...today Zhen went to meet everyone for the interviews. After basically just a quick meeting with the chairman of the group, Zhen was offered the job. It's in our view an even better opportunity than if he had matched with the colo-rectal fellowships. As this can't possibly be more specialized than that.
What's so amazing is that he does not seem so qualified for the job and there were SIX other residents going for the job. I mean the guy that was supposed to join the group in the first place was from John's Hopkins! We are very grateful for this opportunity that seemingly just plopped on our laps. The whole way home today we could not stop talking about how lucky we were. Our future is so bright...I just can't wait!

It's a Girl?!?

2007-02-09T00:14:00.000-05:00

We had the ultrasound done last week and I finally got around today to post them. The first one is the profile of our baby what looks like is sucking on the placenta. The second one is of baby's foot. The last one is of baby in profile sucking on the thumb. The tech told us she thinks it's a girl. It's because we didn't see anything between her legs. No hotdog bun or hamburger. :-( It's making me want to go get a 4D ultrasound. The people at the desk told me it's only $150. Don't you think it's worth it to find out?

So Pregnant

2007-01-30T21:30:00.000-05:00

Yesterday at 1am I was sitting there eating bread and pickles and the thought came to me "I'm so pregnant". I don't think I would have ever ate that any time before but it was just sooo good last night. It's still strange that I don't get hungry that often but when I do, the choices I make tells the whole story. :-) I can't wait 'till tomorrow. It's the day of my big ultrasound where we can hopefully see if it's a boy or a girl! Yeah!!!

Kitty Washing Machine

2007-01-26T14:51:00.001-05:00

This was really funny to me for some reason. I was thinking of poor Jada going through this... :-) She wouldn't even get in there the second time.

Credit Card Company Promotions

2007-01-25T01:19:00.000-05:00

Someone remind me to stop calling credit companies in the middle of the night. I just got off the phone quite annoyed because some guy named "Shawn" in India got on my last nerve trying to pitch some credit protection thing. He kept on emphasizing on the fifthteeennn dolar! rebate coupon. I mean nothing against the people in India, but it seems that they just don't take no, thank you for what it really means...NO!!! Urgh...and it's not like he helped me at all with the original problem I called about. He just spewed a whole lot of scripted stuff memorized off a manual somewhere. Basically telling me the same things over and over no matter how I change the approach. Seriously, you'd think I learned my lesson w/ the Dell service people last year when I had to speak to someone from India for over two weeks to just get someone to fix my damn computer. Sorry for the rant.

Movement!

2007-01-16T14:11:00.000-05:00

Late last night I finally felt the baby move! Well it wasn't much of a movement but more like a push against me. It was around the area of my belly button that I felt something poking me from the inside. That was the strangest feeling ever! I was so excited I could not sleep for a good two hour afterwards. ^-^

2006-12-29T01:43:00.001-05:00

Curse of the Golden Flower

2006-12-23T00:13:00.000-05:00

I can't wait for this movie to come out! It'll be a long time before March 1st but...
Just wish it was online somewhere (hint hint hint). Gong Li is so beautiful isn't she?

Asian Mei

2006-12-22T01:44:00.000-05:00

This is my 6 month old girl Mei Mei (little sister in Chinese) I took this picture of her and it made her look like she was a Chinese girl. I thought it was so cute I made it as my desktop wallpaper to make me feel better on a bad day.

Baby's 1st Picture!

2006-11-20T15:37:00.000-05:00

U/S

2006-11-16T23:38:00.000-05:00

I had my first appt. today at the OB-Gyn office. The biggest worry I had was if this baby was doing ok...and being able to hear the heart beat in my mind is the best validation. Well we one-upped it. We got to do an ultrasound (cuz we weren't sure of the conception date and in turn due date). I think it is the biggest joy in the world to be able to see your baby...no matter how small...on a screen with a nice strong heart beat. :-D I'm going to post the little bugger when I get a chance since I'm so proud of it. Right now I'm going to go get some sleep since my one and only symptom is tiredness. I mean, I basically wake up tired and just look forward to crawling back to bed all day. Probably not making much sense anyways. G'night.

2006-11-01T20:36:00.000-05:00

I was going to wait to tell everyone since it's still really early and I still could misscarry but... I'm pregnant! I thought since my wonderful mother-in-law blabbed to everyone about it I might as well get the word out.

This little ticker is so cute! I love how my baby looks right now :-D Like a little fish/toad/monkey embryo...

House

2006-09-26T23:06:00.000-04:00

I was excited that House had "Asberger's Syndrome" it truly explained everything. But sadly that was just a way for Winston to convince the boss lady. He is still great though w/o the mental issues (ha ha just kidding, of course he has mental issues).
I asked Zhen if he knew who the person I love second to him. I gave him two clues: Fictional and Medical. His guess? McDreamy. LoL I told him second to him, not love more than him. I really enjoy House's wit and brains. I believe if Einstein were alive, I'd pull an Anna Nicole Smith.
Um... not the marrying an old guy for his money. More like just marrying a very very old guy :o) Being that he's like 127. Zhen thinks that Einstein wouldn't marry me because he is married to his work. I told him "and that's different from you how?" You see, my wonderful hubby is married to the hospital. Especially this week due to his exam on Saturday. :-(

My fav. Quote from House today was: House to girl assistant
Spoken like a true circle queen. See, skinny socially privileged white people get to draw this neat little circle and everyone inside the circle is normal. Anyone outside the circle should be beaten, broken and reset so that they can be brought inside the circle. Failing that, they should be institutionalized or worse...Pitied.

Second fav. Quote: House to Cuddy
Never threaten unless you're willing to deliver. Makes you seem weak. Thank God you don't have children!
Now that is hilarious just cuz there's an on-going joke that House has towards Cuddy about how she's trying to have a baby.

For those of you that have not seen House... You should really reconsider. Watch it before there's more than two seasons to catch up ^-^.

What have I been busy doing?

2006-08-31T03:18:00.000-04:00

Lets see...
Mostly being a bum. I'm supposed to be studying for the GREs in October but I'm slacking on that (yet again). I just started a my space account...actually I've had it open for a while. Just never got around to putting anything on it. For any of you guys that have one...you can add me now. It looks quite sad w/ my only 4 friends :-D ...one being mr. popular, Tom. I found a lot of people that went to Anderson and graduated my year through myspace. Brings back a lot of bad memories really. I was never a groupie.
Lately when I'm online, I usually am on Yahoo's 9 very addicting.
With that and Gizmodo I can spend hours doing usless nothings. Fun huh?
It's late because I fell asleep w/ Zhen and woke up all of a sudden at 2:30am for some reason. Now I can't go back to sleep. Another day in the life of little 'ol me.
Ten more days 'till our cruise. I did a lot of shopping today and am almost done w/ my todo-lists. Need to get post cards for our Meet and Mingle from cruise critic. Does Cincinnati even have those? I might not even go...cuz I'm so introverted anyways...we'll see.

2006-08-16T12:29:00.000-04:00

Only 24 Days 'till cruise to Caribbeans!
Sucks that my in-laws are tagging along though :'(
Don't ask, I might start crying.

Typhoon in Asia 08/2006

2006-08-16T01:05:00.000-04:00

A standing ovation for these weather/news reporters. They brave the dangers and risk their lives to report on storms such as this. Kind of funny too. The following is some commentary on what they were saying:

Guy (yelling): ...the rain, the rain is coming from all directions hitting my face. Extremely painful! I can't open my eyes anymore!

Girl: ...if it weren't for the rope tied to me, there would be no way I could stand up. (screaming) The rain is blowing into my mouth I can't even speak anymore

The Messengers

2006-07-31T00:12:00.000-04:00

I'm watching this show now called "The Messengers". It's been very inspirational. I will show you what I mean... The first speaker of the night was this woman with a heavenly voice and sharp wit. This is the poem she recited as part of her speach dealing w/ struggles.

I wish for you,

the attainment of all the great things you pursue.

For you see, I wish for you,

your engagement of the act of pursuit

of life and love of joy and peace

of happiness and abundant feats

of amazement and accomplishments

of miracles and unbelievable documents to chronicle

your disbeliever’s astonishments.

For I wish for you the limitless possibilities of life.

No negativity, just positively, no overwhelming strife.

And although obstacles for you will come,

I wish for you the constant knowledge

that not one of them owns power over you.

For I wish for you the power to renew your strength.

In times of testing and what may seem like punishment,

but know that it is just nourishment for your determination muscle

you see it grows when your back is bent.

By the enormity of the weight straddling your shoulders.

Now I do not wish that all your wants simply appear.

But I wish for your seeking, so you'll meet what is dear

and intended for your career, for your mission and your purpose.

No coincidences just divined worship ordained in truth.

Cuz you see all that is intended shall be provided unto you.

And this is my wish for you, my daughter.

Pimp my dog

2006-07-27T23:44:00.000-04:00

Um...never mind

2006-07-20T01:35:00.000-04:00

Grey's Anatomy - Prom

2006-07-20T01:00:00.000-04:00

GRACE by Kate Havnevik

I'm on my knees
only memories
are left for me to hold

Don't know how
but I'll get by
Slowly pull myself together

There's no escape
So keep me safe
This feels so unreal

Nothing comes easily
Fill this empty space
Nothing is like it seems
Turn my grief to grace

I feel the cold
Loneliness unfold
Like from another world

Come what may
I won't fade away
But I know I might change

Nothing comes easily
Fill this empty space
Nothing is like it was
Turn my grief to grace

Nothing comes easily
Where do I begin?
Nothing can bring me peace
I've lost everything
I just want to feel your embrace

I was watching some of Grey's Anatomy today. The last episode of this year (season 2) they had a prom and this song was played...it made me think of someone. Even after being married for almost two years, I still think of him. The first time I saw this episode and heard this song, I cried. I believe that once you love someone it will always be with you 'till the day you die. I'm glad Zhen understands this and accepts me for who I am...along w/ this "flaw" in me. It still hurts a lot sometimes. Sorry...in a weird mood.

Could Not Imagine

2006-06-20T01:36:00.000-04:00

On Sunday I had to go in to work at the Children's hospital here. After the appt. was done and on my way to the car, I saw some people gathered around a van. What made me curious were two women standing away from the main group...huddled together and crying. After I stopped and watched some more, I noticed a woman in a wheelchair holding a child. My heart sank suddenly then because I realized that the child had already passed. The group of people were actually handing the child over to the morgue.

Just watching them made me feel tears well up. I could not imagine how it would be for that mother to have to say goodbye to a child, let alone one that was already three/four years old. I know that little girl will be an angel watching over everyone she had touched over her short life... and I pray that her family will not suffer too much from her loss.

GA

2006-05-07T23:26:00.000-04:00

McDreamy bad
McVet good

2006-04-30T23:35:00.000-04:00

Another picture of Poco. He did the funniest thing just a moment ago. He's sleeping in his crate when all of a sudden he barked. I think he was dreaming of Zhen :-)
Tomorrow will be the first day of my new job as a medical interpreter for University Hospital (part time). I'm quite excited/worried about it. It's a big commitment for me since I have never had a job in which I couldn't back out of something last minute. First was the lab and then the contracted interpreting... However, there has been a lot of firsts w/ this job. Since I've never been to an interview of any kind until I had to go to one for this job. I think the one thing that'll be on mind the whole time during orientation is Poco, since I haven't been apart from him since he came home for any longer than a hour.

Poco

2006-04-30T01:45:00.000-04:00

Ok, I can't help myself. I admit it. But this time it's not really my fault. What had happened was that Zhen lost Casey (our second cat for those of you who don't know) while I was at my parents the only night I was away. So as a "replacement" pet for Casey...even though in my mind he can't be replaced...Zhen and I decided it was time for a dog. So this is our newest member of the family. His name is Poco (Spanish for "little" I think), he weighs in at 2.35 pounds and he was exactly 4 months old when I got him. For a little guy, he has lots of personality.
I don't know how I do it every time. Whenever I go out for a pet, I have in my mind what my ideal would be and every time I come back with that very same thing. Not that I'm complaining of course...just I'm really bewildered in how it works out great every time. For those of you who think I am running a zoo (I think everyone I know has told me that), I have now: 8 fish, 2 golden snails, 3/4 shrimp in my fish tank and 1 cat and 1 dog. So it's not as bad as it sounds. Just seems like I'm getting a new pet every month or so. ^-^ Stay tuned for tons of cute pictures of Poco.

Oops

2006-04-21T23:51:00.000-04:00

Without even realizing it, a whole month has almost passed by. Don't worry nothing drastic has happened recently... other than the fact that I got hired by the University Hospital here as an in house interpreter. I guess I'm just goofing off for these next two years until Zhen settles down. Well here is another lip-syncing video that I loved.

This guy is so adorable! I hope he never hears anyone say that, he doesn't look like the type that would like people talking about him that way ^-^

Chinese Movies

2006-03-27T22:35:00.000-05:00

I'm sick and tired of those "modern" Asian movies where everything moves by really slowly and are supposed to be "artistic". Something that would win tons of awards at any random film festival. I guess it's just me but... I really enjoy the big budget movies with tons of action. The plot thickens in the first five minutes and one thing leads to another as fast as you can blink your eyes...those are what people should waste their time on. Not those movies in which no one has any idea what's happening, including the director. They should not be a form of entertainment...more like a great way to torture someone. I'm just ranting because I watched yet another movie in which from the beginning I tried to convince myself would get better...'till the very end. Really...I should do something better with my life.

Oscars

2006-03-06T02:21:00.000-05:00

Props to Jon Stewart for his wonderful hosting at the oscars last night. They should keep him for the years to come.

Donald Trump for President?

2006-03-01T21:53:00.000-05:00

What do you guys think of this idea? Sorry I'm being so political these days...just I feel that anyone will do a better job than Bush right now. I can't wait for 2008. Hey Donald! Stop messing w/Martha and the little meaningless quibbles...and start going for what's really important. Prez. Trump!

Ironic

2006-02-27T04:24:00.000-05:00

Just a car Zhen and I "ran" across while driving into Chicago in August of '05. The dent in the car made me question what they called "driving". I joined this website called Flickr which is a quite popular photo storage/sharing/etc. place (even though it's still in Beta as of now). The reason I think so many people like it is because the ideas they have are simple but very useful at the same time. Well, joining the site caused me to go through some pictures of mine from last year and hence the picture.

1984

2006-02-24T17:11:00.000-05:00

Don't know about the next guy but I am pretty upset at this new bill. The idea of the government being able to keep track of our every move for our "own good" is becoming eerily identical to big brother. RFID tags, personal DNA data, fingerprints, and retinal scans... I mean...REALLY!?! It's only a hop away from flying machines that keep an eye on what you are doing. Just like a real big brother would. Freedom my ass.

Grey's Anatomy

2006-02-19T22:32:00.000-05:00

One word... McSteamy

2006-02-09T23:51:00.000-05:00

The horse could have snuck out of the barn today to go for a ride on its own. However, it waited quitely for the farmer to return and treat it well. Still the farmer leaves the horse alone to fend for itself. Neglect is worse than punishment sometimes.

2006-02-09T23:47:00.000-05:00

How can a farmer obtain a horse and choose not to use it? The horse yearns to be taken out and ridden or worked. Not left in the barn to just eat the hay and be content.

Will Demps

2006-02-01T06:50:00.000-05:00

The other day I got to watch off of my Media Center, MTV Cribs. Hee hee... one of the best six and a half minutes I spent in a while. I think I was drolling so much I didn't need to take a shower afterwards :-P Some of you might say: "But June, aren't you already married to a wonderful husband whom you love dearly?" I will probably reply something like: "It's O.K., a woman's allowed to droll isn't she? Can't ya give her that much?"
I started doing a search on this FS (not a sports person so I don't know what that means) for the Baltimore Ravens (who by the way won't be renewed for the '06 season). I found out he's about 2 years older than me, half black and half proud Korean...and may I say a wonderful mix at that. As you can see in exibit one, his nose. I don't what it's about his nose that I find so appealing but....
Moving on... he has his own website where there are a few "good" pictures of him and his muscles ;-). You could find him on this website for the Baltimore magazine online about some single people in Baltimore. Some other girl had went through the same phase as I did but a week earlier. Other than that...not much else I could find though :-) But then I didn't use all of my old stalking skills. ;-) Just kidding.
Being an avid fan of Bittorrent and etc. I tried to find the downloadable version of the show but could not find anything for the life of me. I guess that show isn't as popular w/ the computer geeky crowd. Anyhoo... I finally admitted to the O' so great powers of YouTube.com. I firgured out and posted my taping of the show in two parts for the worshippers of Will. So here they are... comments are welcome ^_^

Casey Eating Jada

2006-02-01T01:23:00.000-05:00

I've Been Tagged hmmm...

2006-01-18T02:17:00.000-05:00

4 jobs I have had in my life:
1st job- Child model for Cleveland's Children's Hospital
2nd job- My father's laboratory as a student worker
3rd job- Promotional model for some modeling company in Cincinnati
4th job- Interpreter at the hospitals for Affordable Language Services

4 movies I could watch over and over:
Lord of the Rings series
Scorpion King (1st movie Zhen and I watched on a date ^-^)
Consipracy Theory
Phantom of the Opera

4 places I have lived:
Shanghai, China
Cleveland, OH
Cincinnati, OH
(Zhen and I are working on the 4th)

4 TV shows I love to watch:
Scrubs
Lost
Grey's Anatomy
ER

4 places I have been on vacation:
Chicago, IL
Toronto Canada
Shanghai China
Cleveland, OH

4 websites I visit daily:
http://www.yahoo.com/
http://www.cnn.com/
http://www.wikipedia.org/
http://www.wired.com/

4 of my favorite foods:
Ice cream - any flavor
Cheesecake - any flavor
Shrimp
Eggs

4 places I would rather be right now:
San Francisco, CA
Skiing somewhere cold
in Shanghai w/ family
Swimming somewhere warm

4 people I will tag:
(I will get back on that...I have to find victims)

...Leading me to this...

2006-01-16T02:51:00.000-05:00

So after being obsessed about google video, I found these guys...They're affectionately known as the BSB which stands for...I forgot, but it was funny. I've seen them before somewhere else online but didn't realize how much of a "legacy" they were leaving with the online community of both Chinese and non-. They are quite talented...not just in lip-syncing but also in their facial expressions and always having new creative humorous things to do on their videos. The following is a most recent video of theirs that they put out... I love the guy on the left taking the role of a girl... kept me laughing throughout the whole song. Did I mention that I think the guy on the right is super hot? Sad is that he knows it :-)

This is their link for those of you who reads Chinese and would be interested in watching some of their other videos... You can also find the videos here through You Tube.com by typing in the search "Chinese bsb".

Google Video!

2006-01-12T08:12:00.000-05:00

I found this song that I have currently in my car and I Love Love Love it! The singer is Guang Liang and the song is "Tong Hua". I'm so excited that Google has this new thing. It will be pretty popular very soon...if not so already that is. I used to love this song just for it's words because it was so cute (uh...romantic). But I finally saw the video today and it made me cry, it was so sad. If you don't understand Chinese, you can still probably get the gist of the video. Let me know if you want me to explain it though ;-)

The Saddest Thing

2005-12-25T01:43:00.000-05:00

This day on Christmas eve I went to church. I haven't been in about five years but I realized that I'm going to be brave and go more often now. Afterwards, I went to Univeristy Hospital here in Cincinnati to visit my husband who happened to be on-call. Once I got to see him, I went and chatted w/ my friend who worked at the reception in the emergency room. Well I ended up staying for a really long time.
While I was there I got to see a really sad event unfold in front of me. We were told that there were going to be some friends and family members coming in of four people who just got shot. Then I saw that all of a sudden about 10 to 15 people come in asking for one person's name. They seemed to be all worried and eager to see this person. After waiting about 20 mins. one lady who was in the social worker's office came out and started screaming. Everyone else reacted likewise and the whole ER waiting area was full of people yelling/crying/screaming. A few of the realtives/friends reacted w/ rage and they seemed like they were going to go right out and find the person who did the shooting. I've never seen so much sorrow in one room. As I sat watching them, I felt myself starting to tear up as well. It's just so sad that this person just so easily lost their life leaving all those people who loved her.
One of the faces that I will probably never forget was of her ten year-old son. As I was watching him sobbing, I thought how he probably will not end up doing well as well... He will forever think of how his mother was killed just randomly on Christmas eve. The time when people are celebrating the coming of Jesus...not of the death of their mother. Where is this world coming to?

What Should I do?

2005-12-19T01:01:00.000-05:00

There are so many plans that I made in the coming days for "fun". I'm just worried that I won't have too much time to do what's really important to me right now. Not like I have been doing them recently...but the guilt is mounting on me like a backed up sewer. Smells like it too. I've skipped the last five classes for Kaplan. After spending 15 hundred on it... I mean I know I will make it up. But will there be time for me to catch up? I'm such a lazy s.o.b. Zhen thinks that I've given up for good now, just that I don't realize it yet. I think a part of me does...just that I'm not ready to admit defeat. It'll probably be the day after MCAT that I will.
Sometiems I feel like the world does not understand. The fact that I've never really had to study for anything in my life and now I'm facing something that will need me to hanker down...it's just all so overwhelming. When I get too overwhelmed, I just shut down. It's just the way I am... such a baby. :-(

I've Been "Away"

2005-12-16T01:15:00.000-05:00

The reason I have not been doing much posting lately is that it has been about six weeks since my dear grandfather got hit by a car. He is doing much much better considering that he suffered a broken leg, neck, and cracked his head which caused a subdural hematoma. I was just so traumatized by the event that I haven't been able to do much of anything lately. That...and I have been getting sick ever week or so. I guess since I'm so stressed about what happened. Just one thing I would like to say about everything. Most of the police officers I have met (along w/ accounts from other foreigners) so far are racists and they behave just like they are members of the KKK. No wonder all the rioting happened a few years ago here in Cincinnati. I am not sure I will ever forgive them for their treatment of my grandparents' incident.

Ailurophile

2005-11-14T02:34:00.000-05:00

I thought I'd share that today I finally recognized myself as an ailurophile. Jada and Casey both wiggled their ways into my heart and they probably won't ever get out. (sigh)

Political Views

2005-11-01T22:23:00.000-05:00

I find that recently (thanks to Bushy boy) I am becoming more and more liberal. All that corruption happening in the white house is just another example to me why Bush should not be "leading" this country. Cheney in that matter. I was just saying to Zhen the other day, even though we have reached two thousand soldiers killed in Iraq it pales in comparison in the number of Iraqis killed in the same amount of time. All because of a lie really. I am saddened by the fact that it has even come to this.

Good Night...and Good Luck

2005-10-28T00:55:00.000-04:00

Yesterday I got to watch this movie...even though I was hesitent in watching something that refered to a part of history of which I had no knowledge of...I truly enjoyed it. I have much more respect for George Clooney now in his acting and opinions after watching this movie. Before, I had always seen him as just an actor who always wants to be bad and therefore acts as the con artist etc. in his movies. Now, he seems like an artist who is full of opinions and knowledge. Maybe because the McArthy era is such a mistery to me...Clooney has stepped up a notch in my mind. One part of the movie that I thought was really cute was that he (being from the Cincinnati area) made a few shout-outs for Cincy by mentioning that city and only that city twice in the movie. I remember in interview that I saw of Clooney, he said that by making this movie he is giving his respect towards his father. That's so cute ^0^

H5N1

2005-10-22T01:03:00.000-04:00

I just watched BBC News and there was another report about the bird flu virus, this time it was reported in a parrot imported from South America in September. Well...correction, only the H5 virus was found, not the N1 strain as of yet. That terrifies me a lot since it could mean that the United States probably already have instances of this virus in its migrating birds which are wintering in that location (actually I'm speculating) and when spring rolls around, we will be seeing that in North America...maybe even way sooner than that.
This pandemic seems to me something that is almost inevitable. Soon, flu season will be coming and if the two viruses do cross, then we will be dealing with something that will be for sure deadly to a wider range of people. I'm especially worried as almost everyone I love is in the medical field or type setting. If this virus does start spreading from person to person, those who are in ground zero are going to be the first line of "defense".

Decaf.

2005-10-19T07:44:00.000-04:00

Wednesday morning and I'm waiting in line for my coffee at Starbucks and this lady in front of me orders decaf in a loud voice...waking me out of my pseudo-slumber. Then I start wondering what is the purpose of this type of coffee? Why would anyone want to drink decaf? Maybe I don't enjoy the taste of coffee that much and I just like the after-affects of its caffeine. So I totally don't understand why people wouldn't want such a wonder-drug. O_O <---those are my caffinated eyes. Can you tell that the coffee hasn't kicked in yet?

High School Reunion

2005-10-12T00:23:00.000-04:00

This coming Saturday is going to be my 5-year high school reunion. I can't sleep because I am in a dilemma of whether or not I should go. When I was in high school, I was very much a loner and was probably too proud to make friends with people. So there are not any old friends that I would want to catch up with or things of that nature. I have not accomplished much in my mind in the five years time for me to be able to go there holding my head up. Of course I got married to a wonderful husband who loves me unconditionally...but I don't see that as something I did personally. I mean it would be another story if I were in Mai's shoes...becuase now she has succesfully gotten into medical school and is already attending her second year. Whereas I am ladi-da-ing around and goofing off. Maybe in five more years I will have accomplished my goal and will be able to hold my head up and appear in front of those people who judged me so many years ago.

My Profile

2005-10-07T09:45:00.000-04:00

This is just something I came across on my computer today. I almost forgot all about it. But it's the best analysis of myself that I've seen as of yet. This basically describes me to a tee.
I think I got it from eHarmony.com They give free personality tests.

Some of the following information may seem inaccurate or incomplete. Remember, that this profile is a snapshot of your personality at a specific moment. It is not intended as an in-depth analysis of your complete being, but as a tool to aid in self-discovery.
You tend to be loyal to others. Your loyalty shows in a variety of ways including your "staying power" with relationships and activities.
You tend to be a traditionalist, and will enjoy the social environment best if it is stable and predictable. You dislike sudden decisions about where to go or what to do, preferring to think things out first.
You may demonstrate positive possessiveness by developing strong attachments; however, you will not be overly involved as some others tend to do.
You show self-control in most things you do; you are not an extremist. Others may see you as stable, mature and steadfast.
You are a good friend and are always willing to help those you consider to be your friends. You also show strong ties, and will be uncomfortable when separated from your friends for an extended period.
You tend to dislike sudden or abrupt changes. You prefer things the way they are. Your motto might be: "If it's not broken, don't fix it."
Because of your lenient and complacent nature, others with fewer scruples may take advantage of you. You could, perhaps, benefit from greater assertiveness.
Others may perceive you as being undemonstrative and self-controlled. Not wanting to be the center of attention, you generally support others.
You have a basic need to be supportive of others. You will agree with others, sometimes even if it's not what you really want.
You prefer a warm, friendly environment free of conflict and hostility. In that environment, you prefer reassurance of your involvement and self-worth.
Each person has a unique way of communicating. We use a combination of body language, facial expression, verbal tone and word choice to share ourselves with others. The following statements offer a look at the natural behavior you bring to an interpersonal relationship.
You tend to internalize conflict. As a result, if something about another is bothering you, you may bottle-up feelings and keep them inside.
You tend to be a good listener. Others may seek you out to share a thought or concern because of your empathic listening style.
Others will notice that you are a sincere person about what you say and do. This trait, along with the excellent listening skills, creates an individual whom most people find pleasant to be with and a calming type of person.
You may be less talkative than some others, but people will generally know how you are feeling by observing many nonverbal cues.
You have a communications style which many people are comfortable with almost immediately. You are sincere, a good listener, not pushy and overall a comfortable person to be near.
In your group, you may support the group leader rather than vie for a leadership position yourself. As a result, the group leader will usually appreciate the support you bring.
In communicating with others, you may support the mainstream ideas rather than new trailblazing activities. You may prefer the stable and traditional activities.
You are somewhat reserved in meeting new people. As a result, you could benefit from more assertive people doing the appropriate introductions to new people.
Many different factors determine the communication styles with which you are most comfortable. Some individuals thrive on the challenge of pointed criticism, while others are at their best in a nurturing environment where criticism is offered as a suggestion for improvement. Each of us has a unique set of requirements and preferences. Below is a list of communication styles that will mesh well with your own. Having a partner who understands and practices these traits is important to your long-term happiness.
Listen sincerely.
Patiently draw out personal interests.
Start with a personal comment to "break the ice."
Limit use of gestures when speaking.
Find areas of common interest and involvement.
Present ideas softly, nonthreateningly.
Keep the conversation at the discussion level, rather than confrontation.
Work to achieve mutual satisfaction.
Allow time to ask questions.
Provide solid, tangible, practical ideas and evidence.
Provide personal support and assurance.
Ask "How" questions to draw out opinions.
Following are some of the specific strengths and/or personal characteristics that you bring to a relationship. These may form the foundations of many of your friendships and dealings with other people. Some will seem obvious, but you may be surprised by others. Take a moment to reflect on each and consider what role it may have played in your past successes, and even failures.
You are good at helping others people to reach their goals.
You are good at reconciling (i.e. you don't like to sulk after a conflict is resolved).
You like to gather facts and think things over before offering a strong opinion.
You are excellent at listening to your partner.
You are generally very patient with people.
You take pride in being very loyal to friends and family.
You tend to work hard at making sure that other people are happy.
You are a dependable and caring partner.
You tend to be rational and consistent.
You tend to look for practical, useful solutions, rather than risky or untested ones.
You are very respectful of the needs and wants of other people.
You are very supportive of other people.
In general, human beings are defined by their needs and individuals by their wants. Your emotional wants are especially important when establishing with whom you are compatible. While answering the Relationship Questionnaire you established a pattern of basic, subconscious wants. This section of the report was produced by analyzing those patterns. Our wants change as we mature and obtain our life goals. You may find it valuable to revisit this section periodically to see how your wants have changed.
You may want:
Scheduled activities with no haphazard or unplanned activity.
To feel safe and secure in social situations.
Frequent appreciation.
Clear responsibility and clear lines of who makes decisions.
No sudden or abrupt changes in the situation.
A predictable environment with few surprises that are not "planned."
Recognition for your loyalty.
Security for now, and in the future.
Opportunity for privacy and to be alone occasionally.
Activities that may involve friends.
Identification with your social group.

Casey II

2005-09-30T00:27:00.000-04:00

This is our new baby...since I gave Sara to my dad, I felt that Jada should have another companion.

Casey

2005-09-26T00:12:00.000-04:00

On Friday, Zhen and I added another new member to our growing houshold. His name is Casey and once I have the time, I'll post his picture on here. I've never seen another more stubburn being. Along with that and a high propensity to cry at the drop of a pen...he is quite a handful. We love him already.

Tour De Stade

2005-09-23T00:26:00.000-04:00

One of my all time favorite shows "Lost" was on last night and I heard the main character talk about this exercise that he did. It was called the "Tour De Stade" and it's where one would run up all the steps of a stadium to get a work out I guess. Well ever since I saw a girl do this at the Bearcat stadium about three years ago, I've always wanted to try it. I know I'm in no physical shape to even go up one flight of stairs in a stadium...let alone the whole thing. Just some day, I want to be able to achieve such a feat. (I know a lot of people strive for marathons...they're just not my thing and when you set your standards low...it's more likely you will achieve them ^-^).

Esteban

2005-09-20T23:23:00.000-04:00

Ever since I watched "Once Upon a Time in Mexico" I have been obsessed about guitar music. I'm always on LimeWire looking for "guitar music" but have always ended up with the same things over and over again. Well I was watching TV today and I happen to see a commercial for Safe Auto (I think) where it's really annoying about how someone has "good news" and they tell you that they saved money on their car insurance. Well there was this really nice guitar music by this guy called Esteban and they said his name and he did his bit for the commercial. I was falling over myself trying to get to LimeWire to find his songs. They were really all instrumental guitar music...I think I haven't heard anything more beautiful in my life. I'm even considering actuallying going to buy the CD's. That's how much I like his music.

New day

2005-09-20T00:29:00.000-04:00

Today starts a new day. I've finally sat down and studied for a "whole day" of MCAT, because of that, I'm in a great mood. Everything is starting to look up now. To think...just Saturday I was in such a foul mood that I wanted to give everything up. Some times, I think I'm a little bipolar or something. It's all those darn imbalanced hormones in my body.
I was just thinking, I really hate it when I'm introduced as the surgeon's wife. It's mostly because it reminds me of my incompitance in becoming one I guess. Mai introduced me to someone she knows as such even though she knows this fact that I dislike this type of introduction. I suppose there isn't much else that's really interesting about me for the moment. Sad huh?